THINGS I COUNT ON

a list of hopeful randomness

THINGS I COUNT ON

I count on a lot of things, like fingers, stars, daisy petals, birth charts, full moons, waves rolling in to meet a steady shore.

Often, other people.
Always, myself.

Some of these things & people count on me, too.

In wondering about what I count on most, on what adds up to a full life, I’ve done what all strategically poetic minds do: I made a list.

It’s as clear as the blue sky above & as dusty as the dirt road below.

Things I count on…

• Love being infinite, even (especially) in the midst of heartbreak or uncertainty.

• Others, for nurture & connection.

• Myself, for so much.

• The curiosity of children, the kind that reminds me to be present, silly, & playful.

• Connection to keep us all safe - however we identify.

• Sparkling eyes, the kind strangers & lovers alike hide behind.

• Open hearts & minds, to keep the world turning.

• Calories, the kind that make my clothes tighter in good times, and looser when I mourn.

• Beer to give me the kind of buzz I need to relax into an evening with friends 

• Coffee to do the same, seeing me into a busy day ahead.

• Music to remind me to slow dance with strangers more.

• An empty left ring finger, light without carrying weighty expectations.

• That same ring finger, missing the weight of twenty years.

• The stars, to guide me. 

• A slow burning cigarette after midnight, to calm my nerves.

• Shells on sandy beaches - each one an invitation to feel at home… here, now.

• Poetry and prose to soothe me.

• Weirdly, work strategy documents that keep my mind, agile, busy, and curious.

• Hope, to remind me of how much adventure there is in the unknown.

• Surfers keeping time with lulls between fast rides.

• Forehead kisses & burning-man hugs - hearts & minds aligned.

• Bravery to keep me breathing.

• Courage to keep me moving.

• Adventures.

• Joy.